The Dark Chicken of the Apokolypse.

So last night I went to my Great Grandmother's birthday. She's 95. Amazing she has lived this long, and she's a nice lady until she opens her mouth and lets something mean and foul fly forth into this world to flay the skin from our bones.

My relatives decided they were going to smoke like chimney's and now my lungs feel like a pair of over used scouring pads, and my throat feels like it was scoured by them.

So today I shall kick back and relax and recouperate.

¡Ataque de los tomates del asesino!
¡Ataque de los tomates del asesino!
¡Le batirán, golpearle, aplastarle,
triturarle mastiqúele para arriba
para el brunch y acábele apagado
para la cena o el almuerzo!

¡Están marchando abajo de los pasillos - se están arrastrando
encima de las paredes que son gooey, gushy, blando, pesado - putrefactos a la base están estando parados fuera de su puerta!

¡Recuerde Herman Farbage mientras que elimina su basura que él dio vuelta alrededor y él vio que los tomates que ocultan en su árbol él son justos ahora una memoria! ¡Sé que voy a faltarla - un tomate comió a mi hermana que cayó Sacramento hoy - están marchando en tomates del San Jose están en su manera!

Me gustan las ranas.

Mi argot es todo incorrecto. Sé que esto es duro de traducir pero ésa es autorización porque Bolonia le obliga. Está bailando en su cabeza, y tengo gusto de las pequeñas salmueras del norte. Por supuesto ninguno de este sentido de la marca, porque su 6:30 de la mañana.

Did I mention I like frogs and pants?

So Christmas gets closer and closer, and more and more I find myself enbroiled in the retail nightmare that is commercialized holidays. I must buy gifts for people I appreciate very much in my life, and I stress because I want them to like the gift (I don't buy ties or sweaters, even if you beg me for them).

I of course need clothing, so I will truelly appreciate any such articles (unless they are tasteless bits of exploded color on cloth that should never be worn by a human being. If you think I look good dressed as the del taco spokes person, you need to be ran over...allot).

I was tempted to put "liquid chemical flame thrower" or "Home-made Napalm for Dummies" on my gift list, but I decided not to (because if you are my true friend, you already know I want these things, and do everything in your power to prevent my aquisition of them).

Everybody's PSPin. I want one...i've wanted one for awhile...ever since some evil monkey let me play lumins i've had this hypnotic song in my mind that keeps chiming away. My coworkers torment me with it, and my friends flaunt them like kewl hip new jeans that I wish to remove from thier person (for jealous and naughty reasons all in the same).

To the dungeon with you....

So DDO (Dungeons & Dragons Online) is starting its stress test. For those of you interested you can find it on File Planet.

I've been in the official beta for several months now though. Must say, i'm rather impressed. Its not like other MMOs in reguards to running around and exploring a huge world. Instead its allot of instanced dungeon crawling with allot of group support. If you are looking for something more akin to the tabletop experience, then this is the game for you.

I'm going to be updating my game site www.ironalliance.com with info and new themes for DDO. Its not going to have me giving up warcraft, but it will be fun to call up a few of you, and say "Hey lets go kill a dragon" and not need 40 people to do it.

Plus DDO has built in voice chat...no more ventrillo or teamspeak!

I dance because i'm sexy.

Since its monday, i'll refrain from anything overly negative in today's post. My buddy Andrew passed his driving test. Yaaay! (run for your lives!!!!)

Hellscream's queue went up to over 500 Sunday. That is a new record. As of today the server is now accepting transfers to the Staghelm server. For those of you tempted to do this..don't. Staghelm has had a reputation of having bugs and lots of downtime, and is already a full server. This transfer makes no sense to me.

I figure once they offer the pay for xfer service, i'll pester people I know to unite on another server or to all migrate to hellscream.

In other news, slashdot had a fun little article about Narnia:

louismg writes "Walt Disney Pictures' Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe took in more than $100 million at the box office worldwide in its opening weekend, riding the back of special effects powering nearly all the movie's characters, from the lion Aslan to the Gryphon, Minotaur, Centaurs and more. VFXWorld has a series of diaries with the technology geeks at Rhythm & Hues behind the special effects. (Part 1, 2) For the fantasy film's special effects, Rhythm & Hues teamed up with Industrial Light and Magic and Sony Pictures Imageworks to deliver more than 1,400 shots for the film, and used cutting-edge technology from BlueArc, NVIDIA and others to keep the effects' production running."

I like frogs. That is all.

The medium is angst, and the canvas....

As much as I never wanted to use this as a tool for my inner turmoil, it seems I have very little outlets to do so. I find my emotions almost running me over at times and as of lately more so.

I am angry.

How can someone be so damn selfish! Have I ever done something so terrible to a persons emotions and feelings so deliberately? If so, I beg forgiveness because there are punishments that include scourging that might seem pleasant compared to be ruled by the fires of despair.

It is one thing, to realize you don't love someone. It is another to never tell them, and instead take out every bit of your turmoil upon them, and subject them to verbal torment.

I reserve my angst. I hold it within me, and calmly attempt to confront that which vexes me. At times, people will not let me find resolution to these things, or I don't have the courage to carry through. But the later is my own sin.

I have given so much, and never expected anything in return. There isn't a "payment" I demand for my emotions, my adoration, or my friendship. There never should be. It's not "given" if there is expected payment. Its instead a "loan" of goodness. You'll be placated, and held in check, but should you ever think that you have recieved anything real or substantial, instead you shall find a hollow husk of emotion. A deceptive mask worn over a bitter face.

Torment drives the fire within me right now. I have no time for revenge. There is no justice to exact. Such thoughts are for the mad. There is simply this..a problem..and a solution. Now, for the courage to do what must be done, lest I be to blame for the situation I have allowed myself to become embroiled in.

More tales from the desert of the selfish.

So, i'm gonna vent (hey..daily posts means you get whatever I feel like posting at the moment). Last night I went to Walmart with my roomie. He bought himself a rather nice Eliptical machine (he has bonespurs so this is easier on his feet for working out). A very good investment in health if you ask me.

So we get back home at 10pm. Fact 1 - I get up at 4am for work. Fact 2 - Hammers are loud.

He decides he wants to put the eliptical together. So I go relax and get ready to goto sleep. At one point I help him a little by holding up one component while he hooks up some of its inner components. Then I goto bed (at this point its 10:30). I get woke up abruptly by him yelling and pounding a hammer. Walking into the hallway I ask him what's the matter and get a very loud and angry reply of ,"FUCK IT! It doesn't fucking matter!"

I got the impression earlier that he expected me to help him put this thing together. He didn't ask me before he started. He waited until he had already began, and had he asked me earlier I would have told him "I have to sleep, lets do this tomorrow."

So after getting growled at angrily..I shrugged and went back to sleep.


How inconsiderate and selfish can one person get? Obviously at lot more than I expect people to be capable of.

Keeping with the machine.

So per request, I shall see for how long I can go posting daily on my blog. I warn you though, that some of it might be senseless dribble as I strain to find things to post about.

Still working on my DnD d20 game (and i'll continue to update the status of that daily too). Got a handle on a possible balance issue with divine spellcasters. I am setting them to be able to heal at will for a minor amount instead of heal a big amount only so many times per day.

This would have unbalanced the times between encounters as the whole party would just get fully healed. So instead the act of healing will be "empathic" of sorts. The healer will take 1 point of vitality damage per 1d6 points of damage healed. This makes it to where the healer cannot heal themselves immediately. Instead there will be an invocation they can take called "Desperation" that will allow them to heal themselves at the cost of an ability point per 1d6 (they get to choose the ability point that takes the temp damage).

My coworkers are annoying. Not all of them...just 2. They misdocument tickets, and cause the customers to call in with completely worse problems than they originally had. I want to douse them in karosine and light them on fire. *anger*

But that annoying "murder charge" is the only thing holding me back. Down with democracy....i'll become a tyrant and everyone will love me, because i'll make them, with violence!!!!

For the raving masses.

Fine! I shall cave to pressure and blog more often. I shal subjekt yu to mai speleeng trajedies.

Hehe. I've began working on a custom D20 system again (some of you roll your eyes at this...i'll eat them..I swear..). It gives me something to do while i'm at work. Plus while I do this, i'm also going to be righting a story/novel along with it. I'm hoping that they'll symbiotically work together. The game system will give me balance, and the novel will keep my ideas flowing.

I'll update info on that as it comes along, and as inspiration of course makes itself aparent.

Marvelous Sigil

So Sigil, an up and coming MMO producing company (that happens to be made up of the oldest most experienced MMO creators in the industry) got the rights to make the Marvel MMO.

This is no suprise on Marvel getting into the MMO arena, since they attempted to sue the hell out of NCsoft.

What do you guys think of this? These guys made Everquest, and are making Vanguard. Personally I like Turbine's style and player commitment.

Karma I think has struck.

Why is it, that we neglect those that appreciate us, and tend to bend over backwards to please people who don't respect us?

I think the Japanese got it right. Even if someone despises you with every fiber of their being, they'll still give you respect until you do something to not deserve it (in which case its your responsibility to restore that respect...not theirs).

(Warning: what you are about to read is laced with some venting. So emotional stress can make the statements seem cruel or harsh)

My roomie is a very selfish person. Don't get me wrong. He's a nice guy, but he doesn't respect me. The worse part is he doesn't realize he doesn't respect me. I pick him up from work everyday. I hang out with him all the time to keep him from getting bored, and run him where ever he needs to go for errands and what not. Should I need to do something though, I get nothing but grief to the point where he makes me late for whatever engagement i'm attempting to get to.

He tells me he appreciates the things I do for him. I think he's unintentionally lying. He doesn't respect me. We have very little in common. He watches shows that I find mentally appauling. Like pretty much everything on eMpTyV, and VH1. He listens to R&B and pop. His idea of hanging out and having fun with friends is an odd form of mingling, drinking alcohol, and preferably being in a heavily social setting surrounded by people he doesn't necessarily know, nor care to be around.

I watch SciFi, and pretty much 95% of the shows I like, he has no desire to watch. So I change the channel for him to try to find something we both like. He gets upset when I don't want to watch the shows he's watching.

I listen to lots of music, including rock and heavy metal. He accuses my music of being "negative angry music" which for the most part he's correct. But its an outlet for me. Either way I try to turn the radio to something we both like, and it ends up being black eyed peas or some such nonsense that my brain is starting to rebel against. (just proof that i'm not designed to think fluffy thoughts...especially about a chicks lovely lumps.)

I don't mind going out from time to time, but I have a budget I have to maintain. I don't like drinking anymore, and the last thing I want to do is associate with sicofants. I've chosen my friends wisely over the last decade, and I trust them. Needless to say, my roomie doesn't like rpgs, computer games, or anime. So he doesn't want to hang out with my friends. (Cuz drinking and gambling seem to be more amusing?!?)

I've attempted to bring up alternatives to find decent association or things to do when hanging out, but all my ideas are shot down. He doesn't even try anymore.

Now of course this just bakes my bacon even more because I broke off an association with someone that had far more in common with me, and appreciated my time far more. Why did I do this? Because of some very complicated and at most psychotic circumstances. I've come to realize i'm not exactly the most stable person in the world, and my emotions tend to run me over. Part of that is this annoying bottling in thing I do instead of just speaking my mind or getting stuff off my chest.

Damage is done though. Now I just need to tactfully inform my current roomie that our current arrangement is not going to be able to continue, and then move on with my life and find another roomie. I'd live by myself but i'm in the process of paying off certain utilities that I find essential. (Like power, and cable)

.....CABLE IS TOO ESSENTIAL DAMMIT!!!!

"I need to jump over the moon..."
~rent

Happy Thanksgiving!

Eat lots, and work it off later. =)

"We'd like to give thanks to the indians. Whom we came, gave diseases, killed thier people, and stole thier lands. You guys are awesome!"

You Are Likely an Only Child

At your darkest moments, you feel frustrated. At work and school, you do best when you're organizing. When you love someone, you tend to worry about them. In friendship, you are emotional and sympathetic. Your ideal careers are: radio announcer, finance, teaching, ministry, and management. You will leave your mark on the world with organizational leadership, maybe as the author of self-help books.

The Birth Order Predictor

blah blah blah..all lies!!!

Clown suits?!?

Its 1:40am and i'm awake rather suddenly thanks to a bout of food poisoning. Carl's Jr's new portobello mushroom burgers are gooooooood...but not so much coming back up. So after that was finished with, I found that laying back down didn't seem very appealing.

Hop on computer, kick back in thrown, pet my kitty cat, and log onto yahoo. Low and behold I get to chat with my ever nocturnal friend (we'll call him Juan because its fun to pronounce and is nothing like his actual name) Juan. We have a almost decade old joke going about his parents having sex....in clown suits (hence the title of today's post).

I always like talking to Juan. He has good things to say (or just very realistic), and of course finds a way to get me laughing so hard that I think i'm gonna have a heart attack.

Who needed a liver anyway?

So this weekend was going fantastic, until my migrain decided it was going to completely debilitate me on sunday morning. I woke up to pain. So some IBprofen and hydrocodone later, its still making my brain short circuit. The usual supliments didn't even phase it.

So my mom came over and brough a darvaset (not sure if I spelled it correctly). I forced down some speghetti and took the pill. It got me to the point that if I laid still enough I could actually close my eyes and attempt to sleep. Problem is, everything under the sun was able to wake me up. Heck, I could hear my cat walking through the hall...how creepy is that.

Now i've woken up this morning and my stomach is rebelling against the pain killers, and i'm on another hydrocodone in hopes that I won't have to take another darvaset. The worst part is my roomie is like,"If you had insurance..." and my response is,"...they'd just give me painkillers...which i'm taking right now."

The Burning Tiraid

So world of warcraft has released some information on thier new expansion. Looks pretty kewl so far. Blood elves are making me question my loyalty to the alliance though. They can absorb magic like a freakin vampire, and then use it to revitalize thier mana, rage or energy. WTF...I really hope the alliance race is that amazing.

Even if it turns out to be Pandaren, as long as they are done well, i'll be happy. Although, mind you...I don't want Pandaren.

The outlands opens up a realm of infinite possibility for game expansion. As does the Caverns of Time. Very smart move on blizzards part. You will be able to partake in the battles of the past.

What the hell happened to heroic classes?!?

Back in the saddle.

I got my website back up and running. New look and all that. My guild is also reformed on the Hellscream server. Feels good again.

So they say Blood Elves might be one of the new playable races in the warcraft expansion (whenever that is gonna come out..who knows). They are horde. SUX!!! I wanna play one so badly...they are kewl

Anyway. I'll get to that road later. For now i'm just trying to get my warlock to level 60. Would be nice to actually be able to run raids hehe.

Sheltered people

So I have a friend who's never seen the Lord of the Rings series. Not to mention, he owns every Friday the 13th and Nightmare on Elmstreet (including the TV series), but has yet to see any of the Hellraiser movies.

So Dave and me have subjected him to the first two movies of LotR so far. Like a crack addict...I think he's hooked MWAHAHAHAHA!!!!

Bizzare Weekend

I have to work today. It makes my whole weekend feel funny. I haven't really been in the mood to do anything.

It's taking forever for my direct deposit to go through too. So i'm still getting mailed my checks, which like to decide they won't arrive until monday on weekends when I need them by friday (go figure).